Social Anxiety Spoken Word Poetry

Social Anxiety Spoken Word Poetry

Austin Poetry Slam, Lizzy Hoffman, 12/27/2011, original work.

Transcription

eleven things I have to say to anyone who doesn’t understand social anxiety disorder one it’s real it’s not just being shy confusion it’s heart pounding hands shaking heads spinning chest tightness I’m pretty sure I’m gonna have a panic attack if I don’t get out of here right now it’s somewhere between awkward and agoraphobic it’s not just anxiety it’s also paranoia like every time you feel like you’re laughing it’s something I did like right now I’m pretty sure you’re judging me from reading a list poem you forget too important to not say it out loud anymore three sometimes I can’t say things out loud but just because I don’t say it there’s something I’m not feeling it as much as I would love to tell some poet how awesome their last poem was what you tell my girlfriend how I feel about her she told my best friend that she makes me feel invisible or to tell my mom I love her sometimes I just can’t make words happen it’s not that I don’t want to say these things believe me I would do anything to say what I’m thinking without hiding behind a microphone or a text message for I know how insincere text messages are I hate it and I’m sorry but phone calls are just not an option for me I would rather go swimming naked in December in Alaska they talk on the phone because it embarrasses the crap out of me when I have to ask you what 12 times just to be sure I heard you right now you know you’re getting frustrated with me five please don’t be frustrated as we trusted me I’m frustrated enough for both of us but there’s nothing I can do about how is comfortable I get in new situations six just be them just because I’m uncomfortable doesn’t mean I don’t want new situations just because I don’t start conversations doesn’t mean I don’t want to have them I get so lonely ouch seven it’s hard for me to make eye contact during during conversations but don’t you think for a second that I don’t know how gorgeous your eyes are isn’t it ironic there here than ever on the saddest night we had together eight it may be pathetic and codependent and everything I write somehow loops back to her but right now she’s the only person that makes me feel comfortable and it’s been so long since I was comfortable I can say things to her I never thought I would say out loud I can go places with her I never thought I would set foot in without running right back out the door I can eat in front of her and I know you don’t understand awesome this I do not have anything disordered anymore I mean we all have our struggles in high school but now I’m just scared to death of embarrassing myself in front of people 10 I don’t particularly this probably sound I mean my life without ever eating in front of someone or talking on the phone or meeting new people coconut with my life constantly worrying that someone is watching me or laughing at me or judging me how can I live my life always relying on someone else to be there living it for me I can’t this has got to stop I need to find my old life and stuff leeching off the line just smooth..

Rather than the usual shyness advice I want to make sure you learn from people who have really gone through it. Like struggled with social anxiety for decade and come out on the other side level of gone through it. If this is your first visit to Social Professor make sure you check out the shy to social page and grab the free audiobook ‘how to talk to anyone’ which is going to turn your life around.

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Comment (8)

  1. you have to take action. Face your fear of socializing with people. I say this not as some know-it-all doctor, but as someone who had s.a. for a good 8-9 years. I was sick of feeling lonely and infoerir and decided that I had to face this fear. I gotta tell you, it’s amazing on the other side, destroying S.A. makes you a fuckin beast! Good luck!

  2. I experience eveerryythhhinngg you talk about here. How are you doing these days? Any suggestions for a person who is struggling with soc anxiety as well?

  3. this is amazing!!!
    I haven’t felt this connected to a spoken word poem in so long.
    So much.. too much, never too much.. in common.
    I’m almost speechless. This was incredible. You are inspiring.

  4. I’m seventeen and i realised i have social anxiety disorder ….i swear i can relate myself to everything she said but I’m afraid if I talk about this to people they’re not gonna believe me or they wont take it seriously. ..i dont know how to break it to my family that its affecting me more and more everyday in my life.

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