Social Anxiety Help: I Can’T Speak!

Social Anxiety Help: I Can’T Speak!

The topic of social anxiety seems to be a very popular one on this channel, and for good reason. It’s one of the hardest things to deal with and can truly be debilitating. The term ‘disorder’ really comes into play when we are no longer able to do the things we want to do, or use to do.

Rather than the usual shyness advice I want to make sure you learn from people who have really gone through it. Like struggled with social anxiety for decade and come out on the other side level of gone through it. If this is your first visit to Social Professor make sure you check out the shy to social page and grab the free audiobook ‘how to talk to anyone’ which is going to turn your life around.

In this video we help out a friend who is struggling with speaking in public situations and anxiety is taking over. It’s not like he’s on stage but he keeps slurring his speech which makes him very anxious. Social anxiety is not something to be taken lightly and I truly empathize with our friend. I give a few examples and my own experience in this matter.

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The text:

oh whoa whoa whoa whoa we’re changing things up a little bit in a different area of the house Russ come on man you okay well Russ no but no heart no barking so Russ hasn’t had a haircut in a really long time look at him he’s a little shaggy getting a haircut on Wednesday right boy okay so I’m gonna read an email for everyone I think I like this format so usually the videos that I make I get the ideas and topics from emails I receive from everyone and all these questions and and things so I’m just going to read the email word for word not say the gentleman’s name and we’ll go from there gives you a bit more perspective a bit more background on on what I’m talking about when the issue is here and with so many of these emails I can relate to a lot of these I’m sure you can relate to a lot of these you know when when you’re in class and the teachers like make sure you ask a question because most likely the question you’re going to ask someone else has the same question but dippity do dog all right dear Scott I sometimes have slurring speech not always but if I talk too long or when I’m tired my speech sucks and in turn I get anxiety I do have social anxiety but not always it just comes all of a sudden especially when I have this slurred speech I’ve improved a lot yeah you have but I’m going to have the first day in college my first day at college next week and I just don’t want my social anxiety to play spoil sport first of all my friend congratulations on going to college the next step in your education good for you it’ll really help you get a job but university in college it’s not just a means to an end no no the end is in itself it’s it’s great meeting people learning new things living on your own er away from home if you’re doing that you’re gonna have an amazing time let’s talk about slurred speech you know I’ve had this happen to me so many times before so many times especially when I’m doing videos I try not to do any cuts but when there are cuts it’s either I say something offensive and then think about it again and say I’m not going to post that online or the other reason is I just really mess up you’ve heard me say social situations those two words together man they kill me they kill me so you have an issue with slurred speech as many many people do I don’t know how bad it is and what kind of level you’re at but I get that all the time I remember there was this interview I had years ago and I made the stupid mistake of of going to this interview is at 10 in the morning woke up at 9 o’clock got to the interview and the first words that came out of my mouth were to the interviewer that is not smart so what happened just like you said I was tired my brain wasn’t warmed up or your brain tired either in the morning or you’re exhausted from a day of talking and then you get that slurred speech and that then you know gives you that social anxiety because you’re like oh my god everyone thinks I’m a loser and I can’t speak English oh my god what happened at that interview was again it was my first time speaking during the day I wasn’t warmed up the vocal cords weren’t warmed up my brain was still done it was it was still like asleep basically and I bombed that interview whoa that was so bad learning experience next interview I had this was for for a summer job or no a job during focus baby a job during the school year and the next time again interview was in the morning what did I do I called my mom and on the way to the interview while I was walking I spoke with my mom on the phone get the vocal cords warmed up she asks I’m just like a mom just asked me random questions just let me let me speak let me just talk about things let my brain warm up let me get some you know thoughts going and you know warm up my tongue in my throat and whatever now that’s one tip so if you’re tired in the morning make sure before you go out into the social situations or before you meet people that you’re kind of trying to you know I may be impressed if it’s your close friends I don’t care make sure you warm yourself up second thing I would do is if you’ve been you say when you’re tired too if you’ve been talking all day I get that too I get that too many people do if you’ve been talking have you ever given like long speeches or presentations and after a while you just really pay attention to what you’re sounding like and how your voice sounds and how you’re moving your mouth and if it’s dry you’re like and like oh my god everyone can hear that I get that sometimes and I understand this is not this is like a lid from a spray bottle don’t worry it’s just vinegar in the spray bottle I usually use a wine cork honestly if you need to carry a wine cork around just carry a wine cork around or something this size what happens when you’re talking all days your jaw can lock up and it just gets so tired because it’s always active the only time your jaw is not active is when a you’re sleeping or it’s propped up by something I’ve shown this in other videos is if you’ve been talking all day and then you start slurring take a 5 minute break if you can say I got to go to the bathroom uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh hi oh hey hi I feel so good it feels so good because it’s stretched out and if we’re not being used and it just relaxes your jaw muscles that’s one thing I would really recommend another thing actually let’s make it three things act like a fool sound like a fool really before your before you’re going and speaking with whoever you need to speak to and you’re afraid you’re going to slur your speech remember the warm up I talked to my mom you can talk to whoever really pronunciate certain words to get warmed up talk like this ah do it it helps it helps warm up the lips and the face and everything you need to speak and do some of these just really it’s about warming up I used to go to the gym and I just start bench pressing what an idiot I used to be that is not smart now I warm up my shoulders for like 20 minutes and then you go do bench press into your exercise you need to warm up before you do something that can just be talking it doesn’t need to be physical exercise this is your body this is your body warm it up baby so I really hope that helps my friend um you know I totally understand how that can trigger your social anxiety because you know when something lot like that happy I just hear that those those little slurred when something like that happens when you’re slurring your speech you can think oh my god everyone’s everyone’s paying attention but do the warmups and if you do slur this is maybe the biggest point if you’re said have said this at the beginning if you’re slurring your speech who gives a come on who cares who cares who cares I know you care but don’t care because they don’t care if you’re like hi my name is Agata just be like sorry let me try that again hi my name is you kind of make fun of it go with the flow poke fun and yourself say hey it’s been a long day bin speaking all day now I’m going to be about have some fun with it I hope that helps take care hope that helps other people as well who are who are similar in a little bit pronunciate warm up and have some fun..

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Comment (14)

  1. I have social anxiety and get nervous in big groups of people. Feel alone and so I am more and more reclusive. Don’t know what is wrong

  2. my slurring happens whenever I’m nervous or socially anxious. I’ve noticed it happens around certain ppl most of the time. Anyways, thanks for the tips! I will def be trying them out

  3. I am glad I am not alone. It feels like i am. Such a struggle! I have a hard time getting a job n don’t have any friends. I hate feeling like a loser. I am very strong in every aspects in my life. Lost 80 lbs. take care of my 3 children n husband. But just crumble in social situations n job interviews.I have to really practice not caring if I burst into tears while talking to a stranger. not easy

  4. Dang I slur my speech, or forget words mid sentence. I have people always asking me to repeat myself because they can’t understand me. I also am quiet when I talk. But don’t ever ask me to read out loud lol because then I just start speaking gibberish. It suckssss

  5. This one came at a perfect time for me. I was just realizing lately how my day usually consists of me waking up around 11am, I dont work until 4pm and I often spend my time at my computer rarely opening up my mouth at all. By the time I go to work, I feel as if my mouth is just sewn shut. If I try to speak, my voice comes out very weak, my head often feels foggy from sitting around not doing much. Its a hard feeling to explain but its as if all my facial muscles are tight and rigid. This is no condition to be in to expect to be in a social and energetic mood. I really like your advice in this video.

  6. I jumble words like,” that, shirt, blue, blue, shirt, that, blue, shirt, that, yes, good.” Or I can’t talk at all! The first time that happened I started crying because I thought I was having a stroke or something.

  7. I dont slur alot but i say wrong wrong words and mess us up how they are pronounced. Also i rearrange the words in sentences

  8. I’m so bad at talking when anxious. when I’m with people I feel comfortable I am able to have normal conversations. when I’m with people I don’t know very well I forget words, stutter and slur my words. it’s so tiring. especially not knowing words anymore.

  9. I used to pronounce words backwards. It was crazy. I have no idea how that happened or why my brain did that. I was in a phone interview and I kept saying every single word backwards. no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stop it. I freaked out and hung up.

  10. Do you want more social anxiety videos? Don’t forget to like this video so i know! YOU ARE ALL IN CHARGE! (comment too and say hi. hehehe)

  11. We’re all in this together. Social anxiety can be debilitating. Stay Strong everyone and hope to see you in the comments on new videos

  12. I have social anxiety so bad that I can’t even talk to people without getting hard core shortness of breath. I mean to the point where I say a few words and have to take a breath before speaking again.

  13. Anyone find speaking to yourself when no one is around really difficult? Something I noticed is I still find it hard to speak even when I know I’m on my own, reading a book out loud or singing when no one around is so hard, it’s like I’m scared of my own voice. I’m going to carry on practicing it though as it brings me out of my comfort zone.


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