Overcoming Social Anxiety: Party Strategies

Overcoming Social Anxiety: Party Strategies

How I used my dreadlocks to overcome social anxiety at parties (back when I was 18)

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Write up:

one of the advantages believe it or not is that virtually everyone associates dreadlocks with marijuana which means everyone assumes that I smoke even though I’ve never even put a cigarette in my mouth I’ve got a hypersensitivity to the smell that’s probably the most disgusting thing of I can think of in the world to do so I’ve never done that but if I decline a cigarette instead of people getting the impression that I’m just really uptight and really conservative and don’t want to even try a cigarette or anything like that instead they think oh okay sure you don’t feel like one today oh yeah this brand it’s pretty terrible yeah I only buy it because it’s cheap the response that I get to the exact same reply of no thanks I don’t want a cigarette is completely different simply because people assume that if I have dreadlocks I must smoke another example is meeting people at parties it’s just a really good talking point I was meeting people I didn’t know they look at me like this they’re not gonna think Oh awkward loner who can’t talk to anyone so you can imagine I’m 18 and I’m at a party and people haven’t really seen dreadlocks before and they’re asking me questions about it and inevitably one of the girls will ask me oh how do you do it how do you make it so I responded well I’ll show you would you like one and invariably I have at least one guinea pig who’s willing to get a dreadlock and in a matter of moments I am demonstrating how to make dreadlocks and I’ve got a little crowd of people interested in me and interested in what I’m showing them and all that kind of stuff and I’m included I’m valued I’m included that’s the biggest thing I am there and I am meant to be there people want me there that was by far the hardest thing to do because I don’t have interests that are very similar to other people’s interests I don’t like cars and football and soap operas and TV and movies and singers and things like that I couldn’t care less about those things so how do I talk to people how what level can I engage with people that he’s sociable and friendly and and all that kind of stuff and this gimmick is interesting to people and it provided an innocent point of connection that was interesting to both of us and got me positive attention which was not so easy at the time..

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Comment (8)

  1. I do the same in different ways makes sense really, I just wanted to stand out and feel valued, which is why I started to grow a beard and smoke weed it gave me more attention and made me less isolated and I felt like I could fit in more, but now I’ve realized that it’s not a permanent solution to smoke as it’s destroying my mental health

  2. think we often go into depth when wr meet people fot the first time so itdepends on the individual. be good to chat to u one day

  3. People will definitely judge you by your style. When I had longer hair I know a lot of people assumed I smoked mj. I did, but not all of the time. With my shorter hair they would be surprised I ever touched the stuff. As far as mj use for aspies, I would recommend using temperance. Temperance for anyone is a good idea, but especially for aspies seeing they have extra battles and are more likely to get thrown off mentally.

  4. I do the same thing and feel the same way but instead of giving someone dreadlocks, I’ll read their astrological birth chart. It’s one of my special interests and it allows me to talk about it for forever but also talk about themselves so they care about what they have to say.

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