Johnny Berba Can Help You Overcome Social Anxiety: 6 Week Transformation Programme
Johnny Berba Can Help You Overcome Social Anxiety: 6 Week Transformation Programme
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Johnny Berba explains the exact process that he used to overcome his social anxiety disorder. This is the same process that Johnny teaches on his 6-week transformation program.
Rather than the usual shyness advice I want to make sure you learn from people who have really gone through it. Like struggled with social anxiety for decade and come out on the other side level of gone through it. If this is your first visit to Social Professor make sure you check out the shy to social page and grab the free audiobook ‘how to talk to anyone’ which is going to turn your life around.
Overcoming social anxiety is about changing your inner/outer projection of yourself and other people.
hey Phyllis Hayden is Johnny bother if it’s the first time you comin to my channel welcome I help people who have got social anxiety disorder and in the midst of what I help people with men and women what I teach it tells all areas of confidence so social confidence which is primarily I’m guessing while you’re here confident to speak to people and be yourself and feel associated with acts of people if you’re a man confidence in the area of speaking to women starting new relationships and being comfortable around women if you’re a woman same in reverse confidence to do the job that you you want to do confidence to be the person that you want to be I think that the confidence to change parts of yourself that you’re not happy with this is what makes me the best teacher in the world when it comes to teaching people how to overcome social anxiety and build confidence I know that that sounds very arrogant and it sounds very egotistical but it’s the truth and if you just bear with me for a second art I’ll explain why that’s the truth the reason that is the truth is because I struggle with social anxiety myself since about age 11 and I’ve not long overcame it in all honesty and I overcame it out I’d say about maybe age 31 I’m 33 now so lost two to three years completely made a full recovery and I had every problem that you had that you had I had every single problem i’m gonna explain i was an insecure man i had psychotic jealousy I couldn’t trust anyone I didn’t like myself I didn’t like people I didn’t enjoy social interaction my relationships were always up and down I struggled for most of my life to actually do a job that I enjoyed I had like I said I really struggled I struggled the mental illness of this it really is a disease of the mind and I struggle with my confidence I also struggle with addictions I was addicted to bullying people as a defensive mechanism addicted to drugs on a recreational level so drugs took drugs addicted to alcohol addicted to cheating in more relationships when I didn’t get relationships I cheated as a defensive mechanism because unconsciously I was always frightened that people would abandon me especially in relationships of women what else is there I just struggle for most of my life to believe in myself and the main fear that this came from was not being able to trust people which was a direct projection of how I felt about myself and the reason I had this the reason i was diagnosed with sight social anxieties because my dad was abusive towards me growing up an abusive relationship with my dad and he completely broke my trust so i spent many years trying to figure this out put the pieces together i went on a long journey massive journey some of you might know me from a few years ago when i was teaching them pickup artistry and dating coaching and that was part of my journey that was part of me healing and coming to terms of this so I’m going to let rip in this video I’m not going to hold back there’s no catches it’s not my style of teaching my teaching is about honesty so I’m going to relax relax and I’m going to tell you in this video everything I did to overcome my social anxiety and in the midst of that you’ll get a further understanding of what my teaching is about on my six weeks program over Skype for our all my platforms most of the teaching platforms that I do a free but if you want paid coaching that would be to work with me in person and the benefits of that are life changing and that’s evident with how long I’ve been teaching people for I’ve been working with people for five years as I said I’ve gone through a transition myself from first teaching in a date industry being one of the top coaches in the world in in that area then evolving from that and wanting to go fully into what I’m doing now which is helping people with social anxiety self confidence confidence in all areas of the life when I was teaching the dating coaching it was just confidence in that area I realized as I evolved as still a student and ever Grange student and a teacher people needed more people that were coming to me will come in to me for more than just how to meet women and how to have sex with them and it was more about building an integral relationship with him self healing the trauma in the past and as I said being confident in all those areas because if you’re not confident one area tends to affect all areas all right first thing is first step admit it something that I had problems with four years which is why it took me so long to overcome it and that was the false ego that was that there was me go so I find most people with social anxiety they have it because number one they haven’t admitted it and admit it doesn’t necessarily mean going out and telling people that is one area and I’ve taught that level of honesty which is great you have to admit it to yourself now it mean it means all of it and I know every intricacy of social anxiety it starts off in the mind you look at people you feel resentment you feel hate you feel jealousy you feel distrust you feel disgust you feel shame and all of these things that you feel when you look at people are a mirror about how you feel about yourself and I don’t want to hurt you when I say this because it’s I know it’s touchy but you’ll thank me later on believe me because it took me years to admit that so you see that in other people and you’re constantly looking for signs of betrayal reasons why you can’t trust people and that’s a good reason for that there’s a good reason why you feel like that and I had it because your paranoia that you’re feeling is for a reason obviously if you’ve been hurt in the past especially by someone you trust in my case my dad you’ve got every reason to feel paranoid with people and was the world I don’t blame you I was the same however that doesn’t need to be your truth that doesn’t need to be true for you and obviously just being logical and using your intellect and you’ve been conscious not everyone is out to get you there’s a lot of beautiful nice people in the world that are not going to reenact whatever the person has done to you that’s created your social anxiety in my case it was my dad and from my dad it was quite a lot of bullying at school it came from a lot of my own insecurities and projections i attracted trouble some relationships with friends earlier on that I wasn’t happy about so that’s the first step it’s understanding why do I have this so as I said in my case I had it because I’d abusive dad was narcissistic who’s controlling his bullying it was vile at times it was nice sometimes I didn’t trust it projected in my personality I project that I into the one I got it slapped me back in the face so it’s understanding why that it come from because it’s painful when we feel like this towards people what kind of feel we don’t know why you don’t know why you feel this way just see people you feel resentment probably like myself you have trouble speaking to people if you have anxiety you can’t listen properly you can’t concentrate you’re just trying to work out a people being genuine are they trying to manipulate your I add as I said cyclic jealousy for everyone is trying to control me there’s an agenda when they’re being nice they’re not be nice there must be a reason because I had such low self esteem at the time so just what I’m saying now just talking you for it this is a lot what I do in my coaching when I work for my six weeks program you’re just sort of talking to yourself first thing you have to do is as I said there’s don’t be hard on yourself if you feel resentment and anger and hate towards people and distrust I know it’s kind of contradictory it’s such a harsh can say don’t be hard on yourself you still gotta love yourself because deep down no one really feels like that that’s not your true self that’s that’s the full C go that’s protection because of what’s happened to you so it’s as obvious it’s the whole nature and nurture of you if you put a kid in to a wild family growing up that’s dysfunctional abusive the likelihood is that kids going to come out a violent abusive and dysfunctional because that’s how he’s groom that’s what he learned if you put another kid in a family that’s loving kind affectionate present are not abusive the likelihood is the child is going to come out but like that so it’s about smashing down this full self that you’ve built up all your minds built up as per a protective mechanism from your abuse and gradually reconnecting with yourself realigning with your true self which is already there it’s already there underneath this full self so this is a great start and it’s pretty much all of it I’m going to keep saying this video I’m try just went blank for a second come on it’s a lot to explain back all my life experience so you admit to it you understand why you have it you understand that it’s not your fault and you understand the projections that you’re seeing in other people or a direct projection that’s coming from you about how you feel about yourself which when you think about it at first you probably feel how I felt disappointed you might be in denial but that means you’ve got the power I can’t control you your dad can’t control your mum your family bullies at school your sister your brother whoever hurt you you can control you and when you control yourself and change your projection of how you feel about yourself you don’t even have to try and forgive people or trust them because that change in projection yourself will change everything around you now I also want to go on a side note I made a mental note in my head because there’s gonna be helpful in this video that I wanted to explain and I hope I don’t confuse you because I confused myself when I say this that doesn’t mean that in the norms of reality whatever we call reality but the kind of base level of reality that we see around us that doesn’t mean that there aren’t people that are manipular with our violent that are jealous and that you’ve got to be careful about and anyone who denies that is denying reality so I’m saying what I’m basically saying is it’s not your fault for feeling this way towards other people based on the evidence and the experiences that you had when you as a child to make you feel this way but within that that doesn’t have to be your truth so if you change the projection about how you feel and you get yourself honest in every area in aspect of your life that you can as quick as you can and you practice what I said in my last videos the deliberate intentional suffering of getting around people facing every aspect of social anxiety on a practical level I’ll tell you how I did it might help you first one was in no chronological order first one was speaking to women that was a an area that I delve into there’s no right or wrong that’s just the first step I did that for a while I built my confidence there I still had complex social anxiety the next one was with men because I had an issue with men being bullied by a man and not being able to trust men and women in general but men so I became a teacher and I started to teach other men who are anxious how to be confident of women that really helped me to teach people and they also helped me back then I still had some complex social anxiety around other people other situations so I started to go to no sorry I started to do public speaking I gave hundreds of public talks on the areas that I was interested in which were confidence with women dating relationship building integrity all these all these areas that kind of all kind of branch into social confidence in social anxiety and mental illness and addiction and recovery and healing and trauma and love and all those areas so I did that that really built my confidence then I went almost backwards on myself like I went into these really personal worries that I’m just going to be really open and share with you which was allowing people in more because I just have a real problem with that I had a real problem with allowing people to see who I truly was so I may show people seventy percent but I was burying the 30 in the thirty percent I wasn’t shame that was still social anxiety and that was even at the height of being quite successful in my life so I thought I’m gonna start working on that and being more vulnerable around people don’t have to do it with everyone but I started mobile and that was fantastic and then as I said I used to have an issue with what I’m doing now I I would a few years ago I’d be terrified to stand in the park and do a video blog talking about honesty and why teach my life I feel I’d be so paranoid I think some was going to come out try and kill me shoot me I’ll stab me don’t speak too quick change projection so I had to practice in these scenarios that my sick mind at the time was creating danger and what if this happens I thought I want to go and test it i want to see if it’s gonna happen cuz i’m sick of it bullying me and then it never happened so i practice being stationary in public then I practice going into things like Starbucks because I used to have a lot of anxiety around going to starbucks and ordering the coffee out loud in front of everyone I had I had a lot of embarrassment that was carrying that’s on the unconscious died didn’t wasn’t fully aware of and so I started to delve into different areas of my psychology my embarrassment came from a bad from criticism so I was embarrassed about my voice unconsciously so I started to practice verbalizing my voice out not shouting just speaking more around people and I found the only way to get real confidence was to speak from aniline place of honesty cited that in coffee shops there was another personal thing that used to intimidate me because I grew up in in the working class background it was just a class fear that I had which wasn’t true but was seemed to be it was taught to me I don’t know where I got it from picked up and out of fear of going to posh establishments like hotels five star hotels and I didn’t want that to be true for me anymore cuz I knew that that wasn’t true it was just the belief it was just citing that I’ve taken on so I started to go to these restaurants by myself order a coffee order food sit there and sit through the anxiety it was strong at a start then I’ll after about a year of practice it completely went away I feel comfortable in these places and those beliefs changed so that really got rid of what I’d call maybe you could call it environmental anxiety or even close iety and class anxiety again is is in that realm of social anxiety so I practiced that and of course I eventually started to work with people that were from different classes which was great to dissolve that illusion doctors lawyers bankers educate people so I just constantly kept practicing in the areas that I was frightened of to disprove that they were true and to change my psyche and my projection and keep improving it I did that what else did I do I think I’ve already said this before I had a lot of fears around sexual intimacy being naked in the bedroom I felt really judged I was worried that my arm it’s just irrational thinking now women are going to think I swilley’s too small and they’re being humorous but this is very true my Willie’s not too small but social anxiety gave me these fears all my body is not I don’t look nice i’m unattractive are practicing in those scenarios and sometimes i would have to call it out and be honest I I struggle with a lot of reptile dysfunction a few years ago I overcome that and everything I overcame my social anxiety was through the practice of honesty so you can kind of hear what I did then I started to work on my addictions as I said I had a lot of addictions the jealousy so I practice a spiritual practice that it caught thali teachers and I now teach myself which is self observation so observe if you feel jealousy come up or jealous force you can observe them but you don’t identify them and I practice that for three years incredible results with it and I incorporate that in my teaching my mentor really helped me of that Jeff so I practiced going right back to the root of social anxiety which is at the level of four it’s a level of fort level of engagement or disengagement so if feelings of even Judd if you if I was to look at someone and feelings of judgment was to come up about them or this person wouldn’t be trusted or there and I don’t even know the person I don’t engage in that because that’s not the true self that’s the ego so this I did everything I did on the social level I built my confidence up changed my fashion I’ve done I’ve incorporate the spirituality every area until eventually it went then of course we all get times when we feel a little bit anxious for human so if anxiety ever comes up I just use that practice but the actual social anxiety self went so if you used to follow what I’ve just said in this video you would overcome it I think like I said the biggest fear for the actual fear it when I got right down to it is the feelings and the feelings come from your untrue projection like i said this anxiety of nail dis right down to the essence of what it is from working with hundreds of people my six weeks program talking two loads of people in skype five years of teaching a lot of people and having it myself and overcoming it which is why certain there’s no on the best teacher in the world you can go online you can read blogs about social anxiety disorder I’m not disputing that from people that I’ve got a qualified an area but they don’t provide a solution they just talk about anxiety they just talk about the symptoms and I think the reason why they don’t have the full answer to it is because they didn’t have social anxiety themselves and it’s almost impossible almost impossible not not hundred percent but if you didn’t have social anxiety disorder and you haven’t fully recovered and overcome it how on earth can you teach other people to do it you’re just going to be teaching them based on your Intel intellect and social anxiety it’s not intellectual it’s not intellectual the some area there’s a certain level of four but if you lose if you use your intellect to try and overcome social anxiety it’s not going to happen because I tried it I tried all these things as you can imagine I tried every single thing before I got to the right the actual thing what worked and what work was very simple it was not engaging in negative thoughts and deliberately intentionally putting myself in beautiful social situations until I become desensitized confident and overcome it and develop the mental tools and skills if it was basing the fear to get right down to it and a lot of stuff online will go into the whole symptoms of social phobia about embarrassment about sweating about being self conscious it’s obvious you already know that you don’t need a psychologist to tell you that so I’m not completely rolling out the fact that some of it may help but from my experience it didn’t help and I’ve mentored a lot of people my six week program that of that of them consulted counselors before coming to me and different practices and they’ve said it didn’t really help they said what I teaches a million times better and is true it’s the truth it’s not me being arrogant or you go tistic all because I was I was my own guinea pig I used it on myself and it worked it to get away so if you follow what I’ve said so we’ve got a bit dark now if you follow what I said in this video I guarantee you that your social things like you will go away I can’t tell you how long it’s going to take it depends how much work you put in and it depends how severe your social anxiety yes I work with people that have got it at different levels some is really severe where they can’t come out the house some people is mediocre I had the worst case where I couldn’t make eye contact I couldn’t come out the house depression panic attacks and I know I’ve kind of I’ve said things in a different order because it’s I don’t plan my videos I just tell it how it is but this is how I did it and I kind of just went into all these different areas I just kept going in so it’s like my anxiety was 100% know what’s confidence of women eighty percent still had it then I worked on getting around men getting comfortable men then it went to fifty percent then like I said I worked on like addictions those little personal things like going to fancy hotels disproving class anxiety and all the rest of it and then that went and then actually worked on myself my addictions and then it went one hundred percent recovery and that’s like I said we all experience anxiety from time to time that’s normal that’s a healthy amount everyone does if you meet new people you’re going to new social situations but it’s that that’s being a normal person but having social anxiety in its severity that’s very different so this is really going to help you if you apply this and the as I said it’s really simple it comes down to two things it comes down to not engage in a negative force through spiritual practice or psychological practice so when negative thoughts come up about yourself or other people not engaging and then practicing disassociate but to contradict that you have to go and speak to people to state the obvious and like I’ve said in my other videos it’s about integral living if you’re watching things like porn drugs alcohol cheating in relationships that’s going to give you a lot of anxiety so it’s getting clean and this is what my six weeks program is about so if you feel you need help and you wouldn’t be able to do all this by yourself and of course a teacher like myself I can’t fully do it for you no one can but I can help you to help yourself and that extra support and help especially from someone like myself who’s had it and got a great experience with actually overcoming it I know every intricacy I understand the mind of someone who’s got social anxiety like like the back of my hand I can help you on my six weeks program to help yourself and get life changing results through this process that I teach now I just say to you I don’t have a structure because I don’t need a structure as you’ve heard in this video I don’t have a set thing that we do i work with everyone on individual basis and I won’t know until I actually meet you so I would usually have a taster session with someone for an hour or two to get an understanding where they’re at and then I’ll go from there and help you through this process to help yourself..